Whoroscopes
Libra: For some reason you’re attempting to get laid this weekend but, you won’t have the time so try and clear your schedule for the dick appointment if you can.
Aries: It’s finally time… to… clean your fucking room.
Taurus: You’re ready for a super turnt up weekend. Like your planning on how fucked up you wanna get already. Just make sure you have someone with you who can make sure you don’t die or bail you out or something.
Gemini: I think you need to spend some time with your smart friends. Call them, Text them, whatever. You need someone smart people to bounce your ideas off of this weekend so you can make some dope shit.
Cancer: You’re more poppin the usual this weekend. Usually no one wants to hang out with you but, this weekend everyone gonna be asking you to come out and kick it.
Leo: Another one with a busy social weekend. Must be some fire parties going on earth this weekend. Make sure you finish your shit you been planning on doing before turning up.
Virgo: Ouuu you are ready to stir up some shit this weekend. And if there is nothing to stir well you gonna find something to make a problem out of because, you clearly need some attention.
Scorpio: Shame, you might have some fuckin trouble with the law or tickets or some shit this weekend. Make sure your reading everything well and following the rules carefully.
Sagittarius: This cosmically busy weekend might have you feeling crazy and overstimulated. Just go with it, it will be over soon.
Aquarius: Your creative juices are goin hard this weekend. You will be making some banger ass art or work. Also you might meet someone new and you’ll guys will speeding into the love pocket.
Pisces: Don’t do shit this weekend. Just like last week. Not doing shit is what works best for you at the moment.